Moving on is very ambiguous, it’s more complicated than falling in love itself Moving on/ way from infatuation/ lust relationship,is like carrying a sack full of sponge,it is supposed to be light you know? But the unforeseen rains just make it too heavy and now you just wander around with that load, everyday.
It is at times,that road you knew would lead you to your destination, but the various bumps and the uncertain track, makes you confused, you don’t know where you stand. Have you almost reached? Or have you not even crossed any checkpoint yet? Are you finally there? Can you celebrate your victory away? You’re quite unsure.
I have tried all the things the Psychology today article said, at times referred to the book by various authors, or read those articles online.
They suggested a variety of things, from giving them a weird nickname, to making fun or laughing at their flaws (this was too extreme and fucked up I’d say) or talking it out to them sharing what you really felt, but in my case, it ended up with another series of texting battles, but the other side was too polite I couldn’t understand if that’s how things ended in normal way.
But the widely acceptable way I was told was, Giving it time, for it heals everything, I wonder if it truly does?
Or do you hide these feelings in a bottle full of sorrow and throw them in a sea of melancholy and pain? Where they lie afloat, dont sink nor drown, just flow away to a land unknown.
Or maybe it is that room filled with the person you once loved, or thought you did, the ones who lied, at times betrayed, at times met you by destiny or fate, but alas time, oh time,has it’s own way to take them away, they lie behind that door, of rusty lies and broken promises,you lock them away and never look back, for the keys, you’ve lost and now, you just wait.
Maybe time just teaches you, patience? And the other things, you learn them away
It also means, there are days you are absolutely composed, so busy in your daily routine you forget about their existence, forget everything they ever said, it’s as though life was getting normal per se.
Then the very next moment, something ultra random and trivial reminds you of them. That peculiar cologne smell, someone walking in similar way as them, with ear phones tucked in their ears, they are rejoicing in their own world, their own place,or that unusual fragrance of that incense that made you feel jittery every time you met, the song they recommend being played in the background or in the place away.
Just one tiny thing and there you are the naive moth, once again, drawn to those wild flames, you get lost in the moment, remembering their smile, their eyes, their words, you missed them again.
Just godddamm why?